Wisdom Wednesday

Comparisons Murder Dreams!

Comparing yourself to someone else is the death to your sense of purpose, which kills your dreams.

I came up with an analogy to help me along my journey, when thinking about this topic.

Everyone is assigned a garden, and a tree of life. Everyone is given fertilizer , water, and seeds. Each seed is custom made for each individual. Every garden is susceptible to the snakes, squirrels, and raccoons that want to eat their produce. However, not everyone has the same amount of time with their garden.

The gardens that have very little fruit , that have been stomped on, and have more dirt than grass, happen because they were never watered properly. The seeds sit on the table, rather than being planted on a  regular basis. The gardener keeps looking at someone else’s garden to see why their grass is greener. But instead of trying to figure out why someone else’s garden is producing fruit, they should be watering their own garden. Every time you look at someone else’s garden, you stop watering yours, and thats how your garden dies.

The gardens that are full of produce, grass, and trees, are like that because they consistently PLANT THE SEEDS THAT THEY WERE GIVEN, and water their fertilizer consistently. The tree is able to grow because it is water and nurtured on a consistent basis, the gardener does not get discouraged if the sun does not always shine because the shade also helps the tree retain moisture. The tree of life continues to give life and produce other fruits. The garden , even though snakes and other animals may show up, is strong enough to lose some produce, in order for the rest of the garden to stay fruitful. Consistency in watering and planting seeds is the key to the healthy garden.

Keep this in mind as you start progressing in your garden. Keep watering what you have right now and you will reap  your harvest. Don’t let comparisons kill your dreams. Remember, everyone has a snake, raccoon, or squirrel  trying to steal their garden, no one is except from pain.

-JaysoJay

 

Business Talk Tuesday

The Work You Do In PRIVATE, Will Bring Praise in PUBLIC!

Do not regret or avoid small beginnings. The time you spend sending emails, reaching out to professors, volunteering, building content, brain storming, networking, and the countless all-nighters , are all necessary components that contribute to your success.

It’s the things that people can’t see, it’s the time that they do not see you working, it’s the hours no one ever saw you dedicate to your goals that will manifest greatness in you, and allow you to develop the  strength and tenacity to progress.

You will know that you are not an over night success, because you know the value of your dedication. The praise you receive from people , will be acceptable and astonishing because they have no idea that your success  is worthy.

Remember, seeds are small, but they have to be planted in the ground and nurtured in order to turn into redwood trees.

You are at the right place and right time , stay steady on our journey.

-JaySoJay

 

Motivation Monday

You are Enough!

Everything you have right now is enough. You are old enough, tall enough, smart enough, funny enough, young enough, creative enough,talented enough, goofy enough, caring enough, kind enough, strong enough..etc YOU ARE ENOUGH!

Too often we delay are success by saying, “I’ll be happy when this happens… I would be successful if I had more money… I would be nicer if they liked me… I could start a business if I had someone else show me how to do it… I could move on after they apologize…etc” Whatever the reasoning is,we are often waiting for a “miracle”, “blessing”, or “rescue” to our problem, but they simply serve as excuses!

Instead of hoping and waiting for something to happen in order for you to start operating in your purpose, I encourage you to open your hands in front of you, spread them apart, look at them,  look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself that , “Everything you have right now is ENOUGH.”

You do not need to wait on anything or anyone, because you have enough inspiration , enough life experience , enough ideas, and enough knowledge to start making moves towards your goal.

When you start operating in your purpose with what you have, you attract success, and you will attract the right people to join you along your journey. That does not mean people will come simply to work FOR you, but  God will assign people to your life to work WITH YOU to get you to your destination.

When you surround yourself with other people who are progressing towards greatness, your perspective will change, your desires will change, your circle of friends will change, and your thoughts will change.

But nothing changes if you don’t realize that you are ENOUGH to start your own engine, and move towards greatness! There is nothing to wait for , there’s just work to do.

-JaySoJay

So Thankful Sundays

“Grateful” A Poem by JaySoJay

I am grateful for the time

I am grateful for the grind

I am grateful for the tears

If it wasn’t for you, I would not have cried

I would not have learned how to fly

Running away from you

Forced me to use my wings instead of my legs.

I am grateful for the pain

I am grateful for the days

I am grateful for the faith

That brought my anxiety down

I am grateful that I have the strength

To tell my story now.

I am grateful to be have loved you

I am grateful to fully know you

I am grateful to know the truth

That I was never meant for you.

I am grateful that I have time for myself

I am grateful for the realization that I no longer need your help.

That’s growth.

-JaySoJay

 

 

 

Free Flow Friday

It’s Okay To Not Be Okay!     A Poem by JaySoJay

It’s okay to not be okay

It’s okay to feel sad somedays

It’s okay to actually feel your pain.

It’s okay to stop carrying the weight

It’s okay to go out on a date

It’s okay to show up for yourself

And not be late.

It’s okay to cry

It’s okay to be shy

It’s okay to say goodbye.

It’s okay to put yourself first

Because it’s not okay to disregard your needs

Pleasing people hurts, and it hurts you the worse.

It’s okay to smile

It’s okay to laugh

It’s okay to say ‘No’

And if people are displeased with your happiness

It’s okay to tell people that they have to Go!

-JaySoJay

“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” Proverbs 15:1

 

Wisdom Wednesday

“What people think about you, is none of your business”- Mimi English

My mentor, the late Mimi English, always pushed this quote. If people applied this quote to their everyday lives, they probably would not stress about the opinions and judgements of others. They also would not gossip about others or stalk people on social media, because they have embodied this concept. What people think about you is none of your business. 

I encourage you to refuse to take in the opinions, statements, and criticisms  of others, who do not qualify to speak into your life. Not everyone has the privilege of getting to know you, so the weight of their opinion should not even show up on your scale of life. There are three different types of people that most of us have in our lives:

  1. Confidants- These are the people who know us for our successes, failures, highs and lows, and still love us unconditionally and without jealousy. You are there for them, and they are there for you, it is a balanced, supportive relationship. They want the best for you, and have your best interest.
  2. Acquaintances- These are people that you have a friendly , surface level relationship with, and when you talk, it is usually on a professional or academic level. You enjoy their company, but you would not disclose your sufferings, or call them with exciting news. These people like what they see ON you, but they have not actually SEEN WHAT’S IN YOU.
  3. Comrades- These are people who see you as your platform. They know OF you, but they don’t know you at all. These are people who are friends or followers on social media, friends of friends, classmates, people you ride the bus with, random people that have seen your face, but know nothing about you.

If someone is not apart of the #1 Confidant position, their OPINION , CRITICISM , JUDGEMENT,  & FEEDBACK DOES NOT MATTER.  Confidants are people you can confide in confidently. You should know that they don’t have ill intentions for you, because they know what’s inside of you. So when they give you feedback or criticisms, you can take it in as a way for you to improve, without feeling attacked or hated on.

Write down a list of people who are your confidants, there is no specific goal to obtain, just make sure the list is honest and true. Continue to treat yourself and others with kindness, and watch yourself grow. “When a man’s ways please the Lord, He will make even His enemies to be at peace with him.” Proverbs 16:7

“If you go looking for hurt, you will find it.”   – JaySoJay

 

 

Business Talk Tuesday

Your Character is Your Business!

You are a walking business, and your number 1 marketing tool is your KINDNESS. Most people don’t think about Kindness as a marketing tool, but it seriously effects how people perceive you and your business. If you are rude, disrespectful, and nasty, why would someone want to work with you or give you their money? Offending people, leaves a bitter taste in their mouths. Not only that, but people may not remember your name, but they will remember how you make them feel, word of mouth spreads fast. You don’t want to lose business, before you get to present your brand.

Thus, your kindness is the best form of marketing, branding, and business promotion. Implementing your kindness comes in three essential forms.

  1. Speak to people, before they speak to you!  Don’t think that you are more worthy just because someone speaks to you first as if that makes you more popular. People will see that you stand out, because you are kind enough to remember to acknowledge them.
  2. Compliment people genuinely! Share kind words with others. Compliment someone with something that they have, that you actually like. Don’t make up something, because it will show up on your face. If they are not wearing anything that is attractive, then compliment their smile, their energy, their kindness, their intellect, their gracefulness, their strength…etc. There are so many things that you can compliment someone on, that will display your kindness and make you memorable.
  3. Listen to people when they speak! Most people do not listen when other people are talking. They are too busy thinking about how they will respond. Take the time to ask someone a question, and then listen to what they have to say. You will hear that most of them offer a service that you can benefit from. Like building your website, catering your event, helping you find a contractor, inviting you to networking events. It’s all about listening, and benefiting.

“Stay kind, Stay Humble, Stop Hating On Each Other! ”

– JaySoJay